Tifa’s Tits And Some Other ‘Problematic’ Things
“Just stay out of my business”-Tifa Lockhart (Dissidia 012)
You know what I have noticed about Neo-Feminism? It really hates strong independent women. Women like Tifa Lockhart from Final Fantasy VII or Cereza of Bayonetta. What is it about these strong, independent, feisty, and beautiful women that cause Neo-Feminists everywhere to go crazy?
Ah, yes, like most women Tifa has breasts. I forgot that it is a sin for even fictional women to be attractive. Tifa is obviously a traitor to womankind, her creators are clearly pandering to the ‘male gaze’ and urm… uh… I’m sorry I was distracted by Vincents leather clad butt…
Why is it that feminists object to attractive video game females like Shalua Rui, Cat woman, Audrey Belrose and more? In fact, any woman who isn’t afraid of their sexuality, like porn star Mercedes Carrera becomes a target of Feminazi hate. It’s like a medieval witch hunt for promiscuous or traditionally attractive women to burn at the stake for the sin of… having some nice T&A? In both the real world and the video gaming one, there is one Neo-feministic virtue that rings clear: If a woman is sexually provocative she is worthless. Similar beliefs have been present throughout history, usually by the people real feminists opposed. Feminists have been up in arms over video game females being able to procreate in Fallout Shelter and Succubi being sexualized in the Witcher, but what is wrong with sex? Patron Saint of Oppressed Souls Anita Sarkeesian once said “everything is sexist, everything is racist, everything is homophobic” she didn’t mention ‘titsophobic’ though.
Sure there are characters both male and female who exist purely for the sake of fanservice. The Dead or Alive Xtreme volleyball game that got banned had many gorgeous bikini-clad babes that were probably shallow as a puddle. However, this isn’t just about fanservice characters. When characters like Samus, Tifa, and Cereza come under fire for being attractive you know there is something more going on. Sure they’re gorgeous, but they’re also kickass and have amazing back stories. Their only ‘fault’ is their rocking bodies. I find it funny that these ‘Women’s Rights Activists’ are overlooking these girls personalities and instead measuring their worth by their cup size (and not the one with Male Tears written on the side). The excuse used for body shaming our favorite Femme Fatales in gaming is that they are made for men, and therefore, are evil. ‘Feminist Research’ into video games often assumes that things that happen in the in-game reality affect a person in the real world. So if I kill an Adamantoise in Final Fantasy XIV, in the real world I will have a prejudice against giant magic wielding tortoises and urge to ride horse sized chickens. Now giant chickens and ice breathing tortoises aside, feminists are concerned that women will be given ‘unrealistic’ (usually Feminist jargon for ‘athletic’) body expectations. Since they don’t seem to be worried about men also falling prey, I can only assume they think women are inferior and too weak in function to distinguish fantasy from reality. I think this would explain the pandemic of women sitting in the street making rows of hard candy and smashing them with a hammer when Candy Crush was released.
Joking aside for a moment, it really does seem that if a character is skinny or busty or maybe skimpily dressed they are written off. In fact, even before I ditched the term ‘feminist’ I had felt that there was a ‘war’ against skinny women going on. The pop music of the time consisted of ‘Fuck skinny bitches’ and ‘all about that base’ and little ecards with “men go for curves and dogs go for bones” on them. That didn’t bother me really, people like what they like and I’m not going to try and dictate their own sexual attraction to them. However, I became increasingly more aware of the demonisation of skinny people both fictional and none-fictional when I started seeing things like plus-sized princesses and video game characters being labelled ‘realistic’. I mean sure, if you want to turn The Little Mermaid into a The Plus-Sized Sea-Cow for the sake of ‘realism’ go for it, whatever turns you on. I’m not going to argue against the fact that sumo-sizing popular fictional characters will make them more realistic when there is a global obesity crisis. However, I wouldn’t go around calling it healthy. Average does not mean healthy, so all that plus sizing Riku to an ‘average’ size does is highlight the obesity problem.
Tifa Lockhart, Samus Aran, Lara Croft, all three of them are fit, sexually appealing women who have been ripped to shreds by Neo-Feminists. Noticed how all three of these women are strong, assertive, independent amazing characters. Tifa is one of my favourite female characters in gaming, she kicks ass, but also has a soft mothering side. She plays an integral role in Final Fantasy VII acting as a love interest, a childhood friend, a heroine, a mother and generally the heart of the party. She even wears a ribbon on her arm to remember Aerith/Aeris despite the fact they were rivals for Cloud’s affections. After her father dies in her arms she doesn’t retreat into a safe space and whine about the patriarchy, she picks up the offending sword and vows to destroy the perpetrator and then trains for years and years with more determination than any ordinary person. As much as Neo-Feminists would like to portray Tifa as a sexual object and damsel in distress the shoe simply doesn’t fit, especially when she’s threatening to smash Don Corneo’s testicles with her bare hands near the very start of the game. She weaponizes her sexuality while remaining a very detailed admirable character.
Yet, predictably, when the Final Fantasy VII remake was announced there were petitions to shrink Tifa’s breasts. This annoys me, her breasts were not outrageous in Advent Children, in fact, her breasts caught so little of my attention I had to go find a picture of her in Advent Children to see for myself. Yes, she was one of the bustiest characters in gaming, in an age where using two terrifying triangles was how we indicated the presence of breasts, but why is that not allowed? Why do Neo-Feminists seem to find attractiveness threatening to them? Tifa is everything feminists complain is not in gaming, she’s smart, fleshed out, feminine, she talks about things other than guys and bitch slaps other women. You’d expect this would be the sort of female character feminists want to rally behind but that would require recognizing the fact that beautiful people are human too.
Believe it or not, there are many busty women out there and their life is hell. It’s not just catcalling, it’s being assumed to be a slut. The assumptions you are stupid, that everything has been handed to you, the idea that you are empty inside and face no struggles. Many people don’t realize that a lot of naturally busty women are taught to hate themselves from a very young age by other women. The petition to reduce Tifa’s cup size is just another slap in the face to busty women, another locker room snide remark about being a slut and just more evidence that society views busty women as abnormal. It’s not as if having big boobs is the result of being bitten by a radioactive misogynist, tits happen. There was no petition to reduce Barret’s muscle mass or make Yuffie taller. Tifa was the only target of this body shaming campaign. Feminists need to realise there is a big difference between taking issue with a female character for being a curvaceous warm hole that exists only to titillate and taking issue with a fearless, courageous role model of a character because she also happens to be sexually appealing.
Sure, Tifa isn’t a real person, and if she was she probably wouldn’t care about the commentary orbiting her bust. Perhaps you think she was designed for men to ogle at, and therefore, you have the right to abuse her. Well, I’ll tell you something, she is a character I look up to. She defies the stereotype that if you are attractive you are stupid, as does Lara Croft. Even the popular movie Mean Girls portrays the pretty girls as dumb bitches. Just look at how Polygon reviewed Bayonnetta 2, citing over-sexualisation as a”Big dent in an otherwise great game”. That’s like when Anita Sarkeesian said that the succubi in the witcher were sexualized. Real women also fall prey to this body shaming, like Renee Somerfield an Australian model for Protein World. Advertisements featuring her were defaced by feminists who then posted pictures of their defacement on social media resulting in their arrest. They accused her of starving herself and other hideous things when in reality she eats healthily and her body is a result of hard work and exercise. Try googling her and see how ridiculed she is for saying she was being body shamed.
This brings me to my closing point, privilege. The reason people don’t take Renee’s complaint seriously is because they believe she is ‘privileged’ to have a great body. I myself have been called out for having ‘Thin Privilege’ which I assume entails the ability to put down a fork. The abused concept of privilege assumes that people with particular traits all have the same experiences and thus see things in skewed ways. That if you are a man everyone has flung themselves at your feet, that if you are LGBT everyone has hated you etc. It’s easier to hate someone if you can go ahead an assume their life is perfect. It’s kinda like fascism in that Neo-Feminism doesn’t really regard the individual as much as it does the whole. That is why terms such as ‘reverse-racism’ have been created because they do not want to acknowledge that discriminating against someone for the colour of their skin is still racism even if that person is white. Just as discriminating against someone for their body type is still body shaming even if they are attractive.
Neo-feminism is like a burqa for attractive women, telling them to cover up because it’s problematic for a woman to be sexual. It’s hard to drive the narrative that women are sweet innocent creatures that only have sex because dastardly men tell them too when you realize that the majority of sex toys are for women. I for one, am exhausted with feminism banning breasts and shaming my favorite bootylicious babes. It’s time feminism got over its gynophobia and realized that demonising feminity just because guys enjoy it is childish. You can’t be a woman’s rights movement if you are operating under the same puritanical rules of 15th Century priests. Tifa’s hot bod should not be considered problematic, the feministic attitude toward sexually provocative women should be considered problematic. We need to teach feminism that we can’t stop racism with ‘reverse-racism’, we can’t stop sexism with ‘reverse-sexism’ and we can’t stop body-shaming by body shaming. When the Final Fantasy remake arrives, you can expect me to be cracking heads if feminism is still so small minded to be talking negatively about Tifa’s chest. Still, Neo-Feminism does have a place in the Final Fantasy VII universe, in Hojo’s lab with the other monstrosities.
I will now retreat to my lair back at #AssFrequency. Tweet your hatemail to @MIBOOBs_ and if you enjoyed this piece let me know and I’ll link you to my articles Privilege The Original Sin and Feminism The Western Burqa once they are finished.